Everyone seems to have their own spin on Obama. He is now the 44th President of the United States and in good health. Didn't need the bulletproof glass and so far as we've heard Trav Bickle didn't show up with sunglasses and a mohawk to the inauguration. High hopes. Everyone seems to have high hopes great expectations. I should be hopeful too. And am. I believe this is a great man we have in our midst. More than just a politician but a great man. So help him God. WE say again and again. So help him God. Tonight he gets to glitz and glam above all the bright lights that shine his way but a tenacious task ahead of him. He admits it. He points to the probabilities of all that lies ahead. Time to deliver on the promise of change.
I was sitting at my phone job desk, hooked into the system when he was swon in to office. I saw quite clearly as he repeated the oath word for word. I was chewing over my own uncertainties, my own shortcomings and there was a man who had stepped into a place of greatness, an inspiration to all Americans that anything is possible. Anything is possible. So it's no coincidence that as I sat on my couch in my apartment, getting tired and thinking about sleep, that instead of watching more nightly news and other crap, I thought of all the innovators, people of change, who instead of doing what they always do so easily, I got off the couch and came back to this laptop and decided to write a little... out of the need to write. The freedom that it brings the soul to just think about what's really going on right now. What's going on right now is quite good. Options are still open status. I'm working my second job tomorrow, an orientation, but for which I get paid. I remember it being pretty much a snow job but that's okay. It's my second job on top of the one that I have lined up for overtime. My girlfriend made me good soup for dinner and expected very little in return. Just to cuddle a little while before we went to bed. I still have this roof over my head and I got a number from a guy at my Tuesday night group. A guy that I gthink wants to keep his head straight like mine.
Shawn talked about anger in a way that made me almost cry it was so close to my own story. One of the things he talked about was putting pen on the paper and talking things out with a friend, weighing the pros and cons of his situation and the importance of just trying to be nice. Just trying to be pleasant. I almsot lost that chance once because I was too tied up in my head to know that you could just be quiet, serene at the dinner table. Nothing had to mean anything. It just was what it was. Dinner. Eating. Unwinding fom the day. And my day needed unwinding for some reason. About 2:30 I realized how tense I was. Haven't really equated anything with not smoking at all for three days. I've had one bad day of it in about nine days. I always make sure to set the clock to zero if I have more than a few. You have to. You have to be rigorously honest about that very thing. Shawn stopped for a while I think, and so far as I know keeps going. But the emotions keep going with you and before you know it you're either not getting what you think you deserve or losing something you already have and don't want to. Then, suddenly, it's an outrage. Someone has made a major mistake and they should pay for what they've done. But did anyone have to die over what was done or what happened? Usually not. Usually it's nothing more than a minor infraction.
What would Obama do? There's a guy who can get downright fiery without completely losing his cool. He's a wonder to watch because he can't swear. He has to be a powerful rhetorician without getting terribly emotional. He just knows when to lay down the gavel and when to palm it in his hand, like Morgan Freeman in Lean On me. Forget that I just compared him to Morgan Freeman. Anyway, I think there is an importance to putting stuff down on paper as much as possible. To get it out of the cranial echo chamber. The echo chamber. It is late. Sometimes tthe answer is sit. Lie still. Sleep on it-- save the rest of what;s lingering for another day.